The holiday season has begun!

As we approach my husband’s one year anniversary, I am finishing off celebrating things without him for the first time. This was my first halloween without him. I’m working on finding joy in every moment just as it is and not wishing it was different. Wishing for something different or wondering what it would be like if he were here tends to be quite a kill-joy. So I’m working on embracing the moments as they come.

My husband is typically the one that makes the holidays special, but halloween and fun costumes are something I can handle.

Everyone has their own idea of what the holiday’s should look like. As I mentioned before, the “what-if” game is brutal. Don’t play it, you won’t win. Take a step back and think about what you would actually enjoy. Do those things. Think about the things you only do out of obligations. Don’t do those things. Your time and emotional energy is way too large of a price to pay for something that takes more from you than it gives.

Here’s what I keep in mind when deciding what activities we are going to participate in and with whom.

1. Who is this for? Myself or my son? Or someone else? If it’s someone else-it may not be worth it.
2. Will this activity bring me joy or stress? If stress-is this something I have to do for the good of our family (like paying bills or getting health insurance)? If the answer is no, then I say sorry, we’re busy.
3. Will this activity be something my son enjoys, or will this wear my patience so thin that it negatively impacts my parenting skills? If the latter-is it worth it? (Examples include shoe shopping, grocery shopping, going somewhere that requires a relatively long drive) In other words, is the payout worth the price?
4. Can I handle the people that will be there? Let’s be honest, we’re all a little fragile. Don’t do something that puts you in a position to be with people that have a negative impact on you. You have enough to deal with, you don’t need that.

That is how I decided how we would spend our Halloween.

I enjoyed every activity we did. I enjoyed the costumes we wore, the company we were with, the candy we were getting, and the quality time to hang out with my son. Carson enjoyed being outside, seeing fun faces, walking around, grabbing candy off tables, seeing lights and moving decorations, and being with the people he loves.

I started our Halloween festivities off by going to a pumpkin patch with some friends of mine. By the time we got there, the pumpkins were all gone (October 29), but there were tractors everywhere, and a llama. So It was a blast for my son. It was a blast for me too.

The next day, I went to this adorable (and free) pumpkin walk. Carson and I walked through it twice, it was so stinking adorable, I could have done it two more times.

For Halloween day, my son and I dressed up as lumberjacks. There are cheap ways to celebrate the holidays!!!! Money is tight when you’re a single mom, paying for phone calls and the seasonal packages on top of everything else life throws your way. Our costumes combined cost $35, and that’s only because $20 of that was something I was already planning on spending for new shoes for my son.

My dad came over, dressed as a cowboy, then we all went to Trunk-or-treat at my church. Then my dad went home and I went to my mom’s where I went trick-or-treating with my mom, little brother (10), and son (19 months).

Our costumes were a home run. They were so easy and absolutely adorable!

Carson’s COSTUME

Carson already had all the clothes he was wearing. I did buy the boots from Amazon, but I was planning on buying him some nice fall/winter boots that would keep his feet dry and warm. So I bought them to look good with his costume as well. Win win, I’m a practical spender.
Here’s a link for the shoes.

The axe was the only other thing I spent money on. I made the axe myself, but I had to get duck tape to make it. Which I felt good about spending money on because who doesn’t need duck tape? So I bought some in silver and some in brown. The total for both was $15 and some change. I got a paper towel roll and covered it with brown duct tape, then I tore off the flap to a cardboard box, cut it to the width that looked good on the paper towel roll, folded it into a triangle that perfectly fit the paper towel roll, and duct taped that in silver. Boom. Carson got his axe. I gave Carson a 5 ‘o clock shadow using some brown eyeshadow I already had.

MY COSTUME

I was trying to figure out which of my clothes looked must “lumber jack”ey when I realized that the most “lumber jack”ey person I know is my husband. So I went through his closet, got some of his clothes (luckily we wear the same size) and Boom! my costume was complete. I grabbed some of his mom’s brown hiking boots and an axe. Then my husband sweetly told me it probably wasn’t appropriate to carry an actual axe around, so I made another card board axe with all the duct tape I now have and BAM! Two, very safe, lumber jack costumes ready to go. My costume was also complete with a brown eye shadow beard.

What makes Halloween special for you?

What are you feeling anxious about with the holidays approaching?